Equal Energy Exchange and the Yamas


September 25, 2015

I spent the day with a good friend of mine, Molly. She is a wonderful lady and I appreciate her outlook on life and also how she prods me with the right questions to get me thinking. She shared something with me that I feel perfectly encompasses the types of friendships and relationships I'm looking for in my life. It is called "equal energy exchange."

We've all had relationship where there's been an unequal energy exchange. Someone takes more than they give. Someone talks more than they listen. Someone that makes us feel drained, depleted and overwhelmed with negative energy. For a long time in my life, I allowed people to jostle my equilibrium. I allowed their drama to become mine. I think for so long, I was afraid to step back from these relationships for fear that I would hurt someone else. I was afraid to speak my truth (satya) because it might hurt someone else. What I wasn't realizing was that I was hurting myself (not practicing ahimsa). We don't have to be everything to everybody. If we are not healed how can we heal others? If we allow others to take so much of us that we don't have anything left for ourselves, how can we truly be whole? We have to honor ourselves and take care of our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing before we can care for others.

The 5 Yamas:

  1. Ahimsa - compassion for all living things

  2. Satya - commitment to truthfulness

  3. Asteya - non-stealing

  4. Brahmacharya - sense control 

  5. Aparigraha - neutralizing the desire for wealth